Kel🦄 (avatar)
updated 1 week ago


I’ve been waking up early even before my alarm rings.

Doing some work before heading for barre class. Oh barre, please be kind to me.




Last night

My sister was having one of her episodes and Kay warned me to just stay in the room as she was gonna meet her bf.

So I was like ya ya better avoid.

Cos the previous night we had a minor conflict when she refused to pass me my iron. I needed the iron to iron my fabrics. Almost went crazy cos I needed to work. Then she started throwing things and scolding late in the night lolol fml.

Yes so about yesterday... she wasn’t in a good mood. Like she woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

She eats her breakfast (coffee & 3 slices of bread at 9pm, lunch (instant noodles) at 915pm, and dinner at about 12am on weekends.

Look at the timing.

Lol. Nothing you do can stop her one really. Don’t give me “advice” ah it’s really very hard, we tried everything we could already.

She was already angsty.. and started shouting when Kay left home LOLOL.

Kay was at the lobby so she U-turned and came back to talk to her 😂🤣

After some back and forth of “faster go into the room”, “take water first”, “just hide and ignore”..

Suddenly it came into my mind.. maybe I should accompany her while she eats.

Maybe she needs company.

We don’t get to talk to her enough because everyone is either asleep or working when she’s available. We used to have a helper for her since we were young but our good helper already went back many years ago.

Our latest helper left after one month.. I don’t blame her.

Because it really is hard to care for an intellectually challenged. It is hard to cultivate something a person is not used to. My family grew up with it, so we kinda know what to do.

We haven’t had a helper for 3-4 months now. So everything is harder for us because of housework and my sister. This I will touch on next time. Again, please do not comment and say “get a new helper”, or “why don’t you blahblahblah”.

So yeah last night I just took the risk and sat beside my sister for dinner knowing she was in an extremely bad mood and may start throwing things. My dinner was late coz we had takoyaki a few hours ago.


She talked to me.

She said she couldn’t move her right arm when she woke up from her sleep. Her right arm was dislocated a few years back and we had a lot of problems because she refused to wear the bandage for the joint to heal. Doctors had problems trying to fix it back for her. Had to undergo operations & stuff..

So I taught her how to massage her arm, tap tap on it to wake it up. Did it on her and asked her to follow. And she did.

And I said if your legs are numbed and cramped. You do the same ok?

She said ok and started tapping her legs...

And then..

She said..

Her: 我看到你的 boyfriend (I saw your boyfriend)

Me: ????

Her: 在你的 handphone 里面 (in your phone)

Me: orhhhh!!!

Her: 他很帅 😁😁😁 (he is very handsome)

Lolol she gave this cheeky grin 🤣🤣

Me: 是吗? (really?)

Her: *nods* 😃😄

Me: 他很帅. 我美吗? (he’s very handsome. Am I pretty?)

Her: *nods shyly*

Me: hehe

Her: R korkor 呢?(what about R korkor?)

Me: 没有了。我有新的 boyfriend. 他有新的 girlfriend. 我们很开心. (No more. I have a new bf. He has a new gf. We are very happy)

Her: ORHHH.. 没有了。 (ohhh no more)

Me: 嗯。没有了. 😊 (yes, no more)

Her: 阿妹去哪里?去找 JH? (Where is Kay? She went to find JH?)

Me: 她去找 JH 吃饭 (she’s out having dinner with JH)

Her: 她去JH的家睡觉?she went to his house to stay over?

Me: 嗯 (yes)

At this point I was very scared she would say she’s going to her boyfriend’s home to sleep LOLOL COS that means she may attempt to take buses and mrts to find her friends and get lost after work.

She obviously has a crush and she says he is her boyfriend. We don’t know if the feelings are mutual but she does come home and tell us about her crush. She very loyal one okay she’s had only about 2-3 crushes in the past 30 over years lolol.

When she’s fixated on someone, she keeps writing his name everywhere, right beside her name also haha. And sometimes she says got people wanna snatch her boyfriend and she dislikes the girl hahaha.

All these we tell her it’s okay to like someone but they cannot do anything more than that. And she tells us she cannot get married.

Sia la write halfway I’m about to tear in mrt cos so poor thing can you imagine that she knows she cannot her married and she knows she is different from everyone else????

I’m not a good sister. I sometimes just try to avoid talking to her as it may trigger her bad mood. Sometimes I have no patience to deal with her, especially when I myself had a bad day.

Some days I just decide I cannot always give in to her because it’s like handling a kid sometimes. If you keep giving in to their demands, they become spoilt brats. It’s something similar except kids will grow up one day and learn. But not in this case.

Okay just done with Xtend Barre at Upside Motion City Hall!

Heard they have very strict late-coming policy so I had to navigate myself quickly at City Hall. Funny how this place is so familiar and unfamiliar at the same time as it used to be my everyday hangout place since I worked here.

Made it to class and... I was the only person....

I was like sia la private session again???!!?? Idk if private session or shared session is less stressful actually. Lol. If there are other participants, you worry you may not perform as well. If you’re alone, the instructor stares at you for the entire 60 minutes.

Lolol. 🤣🤣🤣

Instructor today was Yvonne Tsang. It was her and me for the first 5 minutes and 2 people joined us after. As usual... 5 minutes into it and I was perspiring. Barre is really not easy.

Pulses and endurance.

Luckily the two other people weren’t very pro also so I wasn’t that scared of underperforming. But as with yoga... some people are better at certain poses, and not so good at some. So don’t worry!

The main difference between the other Barre class I attended at The Eaqlia Studio last week was...

1) Upside Motion is more spacious, wide, white and bright.
2) There are bars by the mirrors so you really lift your legs up like how ballet dancers do.
3) The participants @ Upside are younger.

The participants at Eaqlia are more of mothers (30 and up) while Upside Motion probably younger than me (I’m officially 28 but turning 29 this year lolol)

At Eaqlia, we had wrist weights. At Upside, no wrist weights. There were 1 long black strap we used at the bar and a small grey resistance band we use about 2 inches above our knees.

So different studios, different equipment.

Of course Upside feels more atas and aesthetics all.. but I felt like I did more workout at Eaqlia honestly.

Perspired A LOT at Eaqlia and really had to change out cos my clothes were stinky. Then again, perspiration is not always = good workout.

Yvonne (Upside) was very encouraging and nice. “You can hate me later but you must do this now ok” 🤣

The smaller grey resistance band didn’t work so well for me cos my stupid legs too skinny lolol!! So I had to pull it up higher on my thighs to feel the resistance. After that my pigu pain ah I could feel my left butt cramping already.

I was counting down to the end of class because barre ah barre, you are out to kill me HAHHA. And you gotta point your toes to feel the whole stretch.

As with my previous barre class, I walked out and couldn’t feel my legs at all. So soft I might have collapsed HAHAHA.

Even towards during the last 10 mins of the class, we were working on our abs and all. No relax one hor.

Yoga you can sleep during corpse pose and you can hear people snoring sometimes one🤣

“But about women with important stories that should be heard”

Sia la they getting Dayre wrong or...? I don’t want to sound ungrateful ok. I am not. But let’s give them some time to figure out the direction and all the price plans etc.

Didn’t know what to dabao for lunch so I bought some lettuce home to make this!

You know the sausage wrapped with prata thing at Gogofranks??

Sweaty and gross in my exercise attire lolol! Gonna shower Peanut and later myself.

Took a cold shower and I’m on the sofa now. Taking the time to reflex.. and reflect.

I’m not a good sister really.. sometimes I just want to run away and hide. I can’t handle too much nonsense a day. Sometimes I try to hide in my room and breathe.

I’m not a good sister.. to my older sis and Kay.. sometimes Kay is more like my older sister trying to keep me calm and composed. Only on rare occasions does she get angry as my sis. I get angry more often.

Sometimes when I’m feeling down, Kay will skip going to her bf’s place and choose to be home to accompany me 😢😢😭😭

I need to be a better sister and a better daughter. Good is not enough. I can be better.

So for now... I’m gg to pack my clothes and clean the room HAHAHAH @crystalcastles so that my poor Sister can come home to a nice and clean room!

Omg. Was packing my room halfway and a friend asked me to send my resume. Luckily I had it kinda done a while back but needed to make it nicer and changed the layout a little.

Change of plans since I cannot go ahead with my previous choice of work now lolol.

Day 7

Monday, 7 Jan 2019

283 8
rachwan (avatar)

rachwan You did a great job :) perhaps sometimes what your Sister need too is just for you to be by her side :) keep it up :)! @urbandoll

1 week ago

yieng (avatar)

yieng You're a very good sister already :) and I think she's probably really lonely cos not many people aside from u and ur sis that can really talk to her? She sounded really nice in the convo u typed but also rather violent when she starts throwing things.. Has it always been two extreme ends? But she's lucky to have u all as her family, to take care of her.. Wishing u all well..

1 week ago

mabel_koh (avatar)

mabel_koh try webarre! I really love them. way more than upside motion. ditch upside 😂

1 week ago

thegirlwhogrowls (avatar)

thegirlwhogrowls of all the sisters in the world, your sis is fortunate to have you and kay♡♡

err i also think the important stories abt women sounds abit weird... thats not what dayre is about 😆

1 week ago

karennnttt (avatar)

karennnttt I like the sausage wrap in prata too!! I always do it with cheese hotdog + mayo + chilli so shiok! 😋

1 week ago

jinnnnli (avatar)

jinnnnli Both your Sister and you really love and care for her. It’s not easy at all. I personally am in the field of teaching individuals with special needs and I understand where you’re coming from. May you have the strength to go through whatever that comes.

1 week ago

iwanthappiness (avatar)

iwanthappiness Care to share whats ur previous choice of work

1 week ago

seemint (avatar)

seemint this just made me tear a little bc i’m jolted to the same reality of wanting to avoid interacting w my sis just bc i dont know how to handle her sometimes. 😿 jiayou keline

1 week ago

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