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50% glitter ; 50% anxiety

September 2016

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it has been a long weekend. (and when i say "long" i really mean, looooooooooooooong.) it's 2121 and it's time now to bury my face into a bowl of warm and spicy comfort food and jot down these floating reflections that have come a-swimming up as i sit here some kind of dazed– a mixed stupor resulting from a drastic and (really rather) extreme crash of emotions. i'm sad. i'm fatigued. i'm running on empty.i'm not okay.truth be told, i've been feeling so utterly lost in more ways than one.

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two for two. eat it. i consider it redemption from the previous day's failure. (minute as it may have been.) my verdict? two words: hideously underwhelming.the portion added with the unsatisfactory level of fish meat freshness equalled to the dish being not at all worth its semi-hefty price tag. but don't just take my word for it, of course. after all, i'm no mathematical genius."with the amount of fish you consume, i'm really surprised you haven't yet turned into one!" h exclaims.

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who can say where on earth these cravings of mine come from? i, for one, couldn't tell you. see, one minute i was laying on my back in bed staring at who-even-remembers-what anymore and the next, it was like a switch was flipped and i became a woman obsessed. so a-poke bowl hunting i went! one slightly disappointing miss with my first choice location later, i found myself digging into brown rice, vegetables, tropical fruit and seafood-y goodness.

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i haven't particularly been feeling any sort of need to write. which is, to say the least, very, (very) peculiar. lately, i do my best to fill my days with surviving. scraping through on the bare minimum. i find i'm in a place where i'm perfectly happy trimming (and to continue trimming), all of the fat in my life. it began with the simple act of scrubbing myself off social media and ended with my ripping out the virtual pages of this one remaining space of mine to start completely afresh.

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as of last night, i have officially completed watching all four seasons. now, my life is empty. woe.

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my faith only continues to be made stronger with every chance i get to be in the presence of my saviour.hosanna in the highest.

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