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shantelle

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to love and be loved.i am dayre user 60384

May 2018

still feel really bad about it and no matter how i tell myself its not within my control, i still feel bad. really, is being kind too much to handle sometimes? isit always the case that people will take my kindness for granted? i feel so bad for the fact that im in a bad spot & i feel so bad over the fact that people took my kindness and good will for nothing. its as though my kind gestures were just temp toys, once played and gone forever. sigh, when will my week be better

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updates

i just did something that i should have done long long ago. am really happy because i did it. but here i am, questioning myself, “oh why, why did i took so long?” indeed, i deserve a pat on my back. i hate myself for being like this and i hate how much i choose to dwell on the past. i really wanna get over it and i thought i did. i realised how much i have to tell myself everyday- i am over it and i am ok. why do i have to put in so much effort to convince myself? i really dont know.

Never felt so SHIT on a wednesday for the longest time ever. Isit because i never go for volunteer work today and my calming and relaxed therapy is not fufilled this week? SIGH i wish i can say more but i guess i cant do anyth but shut up and roll into a sushi. Being a human sucks, really. So much of wanting things to work but at the same time feeling bad about certain stuff. oh why oh why.

April 2018

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so many things inside my head and i think the sequencing also haywire(??????) i really need a good break from work and im thankful for weekends :’) so many things to like remember and so many other life decisions to think about. honestly just wanna like buy a one way plane ticket to somewhere far and never return like ever.its not that life isnt great, i love my current lifestyle now cause its pretty carefree but i just dw to make those uni decisions blablabla anyone feels me :’)

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HSBC Treetop Walk

glad that this space is still around :’)

February 2018

was contemplating on whether i should export my dayre posts to wordpress and i decided to cause why not just give it a try? thank you @dayxport and @gilliansng !! really appreciate all of these efforts!! this is prob my last goodbye unless dayre is gonna be back 😔 see ya on my new site: www.negnix.wordpress.com

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