mwoots (avatar)
updated 1 year ago

How much would you invest in your children's education?

I actually do not think that I'll face this dilemma so early. Well, my little baby is just barely 3 years old.

So we have decided to Emma to pre-school in Jan 2018 way back in mid year 2017. We were choosing schools based on location due to transportation concern. And here came the bonus question, "how much should we budget for her school fees?".

We were already paying RM1,250 for full time nanny. I would imagine after she has started school, the monthly expenses (half day school & half day

nanny) shouldn't be more than 30% of what we were paying. So we started the school search. I was impressed by TCH but many people told me that I shouldn't spend so much on school fee at her age. So we decided to send her to this not-too-conventional kindy. They do not brand themselves as Montessori school and operates in a single storey corner house. The school is not that well kept but I can make do with it. I was impressed by the passion of the principal and her thoughts on education

(which later I think I got conned haha). The school fees is also within our budget and so I enrolled her immediately after first visit.

She was so excited when I let her tried on the uniform 2 weeks before school starts. Since that day you can practically heard her talking about going school every single day.

I did not get any notification on when will school start and things that we should prepare (I was told that there will be email sending to parents). And it finally came on last few days of 2017 and I was surprised that school starts on 5 Jan. Huh? On a Friday? Personally I was not too impressed by it. Why not 2nd or 3rd

just like everyone else. And why on a Friday? We need to build the momentum and routine for the young child to get used to going school. To start a day and stop for 2 days is not good to build a routine (this is just my thoughts).

She did extremely well on first day. There were no tears and drama. I practically just dropped her off at the class and left, just like how we do it everyday at nanny's place. And on Day 1 I noticed 2 things which I did not feel too comfy with. The hub said I am overly picky haha.

So this is how it went. The arrangement is nanny will pick her up from school daily and she will spend second half of the day at nanny's place. On Day 1, when we arrived at the school, I was shocked that there was nobody standing at the side gate (they use side gate instead of main gate) to welcome the students (and also monitor the people who are going in and out of the school). We went in and i was puzzled on where I should go. So I asked a teacher and I brought Emma to her class.

Nobody actually guided her to take off her shoes and to put them in the right place. So I was the one teaching her what to do etc. Up until this moment, no teacher came up to us. I was already quite pissed at the moment.

So fast forward to after school, I was peeping at the side while letting the nanny to pick her up. Once nanny left with her, I went to see the teacher to find out how was Emma doing in class. To my horror, the teacher shouted,"Emma Emma! Mummy is here!"

But my girl just left 1 min ago!!! How could you not realize that she has gone home? OMG! I kept telling myself that it's ok cos it's first day anyway. The teacher probably cannot remember faces. I was seriously worried and hub kept assuring me that everything will be ok.

And here comes the drama...

"Mama I dowan go school."

"Mama I dowan go school."

She just kept mumbling this to me during the weekend 😞

And so on Monday it's Day 2 at school. She refused to come out of the bed. Refused to change into uniform. Refused to walk out of the house. Hugged on me like koala bear in front of the school.

She didn't shed a single drop of tears because I told her before that I want her to be happy and make new friends at school and if she cries then mama will cry too.

I know she has tried her best and yet she doesn't like the school for duno what reason.

And you know what's the best part?

On Day 2 there was still no teacher welcoming her or guiding her on things she should do before entering the class. And this continued for the next 2 weeks. They rather sit at one corner (not with other kids mind you) than to walk up to welcome her. Am I asking too much? I don't think so. Did they just do it to my child? I don't know. What's wrong with these people? I have to guide her to do the necessaries before entering class. And if she koala bear-ed me, I have to bring her little friend out

to bring her into the class. And within these 10 mins of koala bear-ing, nobody (I repeat NOBODY) came to us. And it repeated EVERY SINGLE DAMN DAY!

And the best part has yet to come!

On Day 4, her teacher asked me, "who was the lady who came to pick Emma up yesterday?" ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? It's Day 4 already for god sake. And you allow some stranger who you don't know to pick up my daughter? And I have been repeating since the day I registered her that her nanny will pick her up. Seriously?!?!

And she repeated the question on Day 6.


Honestly I understand that children will have separation anxiety. And I know it's difficult for a child at 2.5 years old to be in a new environment. However, anyone who knows Emma will know that she is a sociable child. She is an energizer bunny. She is not afraid of new environment and new people. She started going to nanny's place when she was 2 months old and there are 10 kids at nanny's place.

And in these 2 weeks she has turned into another person. She would sit at one corner emo-ing. She no longer sings. She no longer tells me about her.

There was one day I just asked myself what happened to my girl. Did I choose the right school? And I cried in front of her. She came to me and told me, "Mama you don't cry k? Emma will go to school tomorrow k?" 😢😢😢

On Day 6, I have decided that enough is enough and I will pull her out from the school. Many people told me that kids usually behave like that and asked me don't be over paranoid. I chose to trust my instinct because I seriously don't think that Emma was acting up.

So we went to visit a new school and I registered her. We were lucky that there is still vacancy. The school fees is expensive. It is 100% increase from what I was paying before she starts school.

It will definitely leave us no room to spend on luxuries or eating out at expensive places. But if I continue at this school, will it impact her mental development or character? If nobody teaches her basic disciplinary stuffs then when will she learn? If the teacher continues to be negligence, will she get kidnapped one day? How do I know the new school will be better? Seriously I don't know. I just pray for the best but I don't think it will be any worst tbh.

Is it worth to spend so much on education at such young age? After this incident, I believe yes. Because nothing is more important than her happiness and development. If we want her to learn (not just on knowledge but behavior as well) then let's start young and from the best school that I can afford.

Day 19

Friday, 19 Jan 2018

5 3
nicvictorieux (avatar)

nicvictorieux Same dilemma and I think we are starting Zac with kindy next year 😖

1 year ago

gelatologist (avatar)

gelatologist Oh gosh. The school sounded really terrible and I would be upset as well. But Emma is such a sensible girl. I hope things work out for you soon.

1 year ago

chhhhh (avatar)

chhhhh Thankfully Emma also "voiced out" in her own ways! I totally feel you on this subject! we sent Kayla into a daycare/playschool from 12mo onwards , it was far from what was described. Caretakers were caring but mostly maids 😅, the playschool program described was non existent. The longer she was there, the more we discovered things were not right. After searching many preschools nearby our area, we also caved in and paid the sky high fees enrolled her into a reputable school. We can tighten our belt, maybe travel lesser, but a child's childhood is only once. And I really believe it's the foundation that will shape the rest of her life , can't save that money.

1 year ago

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