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Meiling

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Your typical Asian girl

July 2019

Today i saw another social media posting that one of my another gf is preggy. Till date, I have about 12 people whom I know personally are preggy. I could be one of them if I did not suffer from back to back miscarriage. I will be in my second trimester now for both cases. After trying for 12 months exactly with two positive pregnancy (though both times terminated around 7-8 weeks), I no longer feel excited seeing bfp. Instead it bring fear to me if I would be able to carry the baby to full term

June 2019

For the 1st time in my life, I am happy to have my Menses back. After my d&c surgery 3 weeks ago, I was expecting my Menses to come around 6 weeks later or maybe 2-3 months later as according to some of my gfs who did d&c surgery before. After almost 4 months of not having my Menses, the flow is definitely so heavy. Today is although CD3 and the flow is extremely heavy with bad cramping too. I am getting better slowly. After having 2 miscarriages back to back, my gynae advise me to see

May 2019

I have reached the lowest point of my life now. What could be worse then to suffer 2 miscarriages back to back? I have a miscarriage last month. This time I got accidentally preggy without the aid of IVF and I thought God is pitying on me by giving me another chance to have a child. This time again, at week 7, my baby lost its heartbeat. I am at the verge of breaking down. I am chosen by God to go thru this. Why me? One heartbreak is not enough but twice? Is God trying to test my patience? #ttc

Happiness is short lived. Did not update about my #ttc issue. I was actually pregnant. I got a bfp last month. I was super thrilled and refused to believe it. After my IVF has failed on me in January. I didn’t announce it in Dayre as I do not want to jinx it. I guess whether announcing it or not doesn’t matter at all now. I have a miscarriage. At 7 weeks. The doc just said the baby has stopped developing. When I found out I was pregnant I told myself is all worth it. Resigning to conceive.

April 2019

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It always angered me to read articles like this. Why would people dump a life away after carrying it in your own womb for 9 months? Some people just have the luck, not taking care of their bodies and get pregnant easily and then dump the baby. While others have to do so much things, see tcm, take vitamins, see doc, spending money on IVF just to get conceived. After getting preggy finally. Keeping a baby safe in the womb for 9 months is another challenge too. Don’t these people have a heart? #ttc

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And so Gordon Ramsay wife gave birth today. She gave birth at age 44 and is her fifth child. They are a blessed family indeed. How I wish I could be like her. I don’t need to have 5 children. Just one will do! 😞 #ttc

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