I don't think anyone knows how depressing it is for me to see people my age (and younger) hang out w their friends til late night. I use the term "depressing" because that is how I feel about it. It may seem petty to think this way, and some people much prefer to stay home and do nothing, but sometimes the boredom gets to me and I start to feel restless, and sad that I don't have a rather "happening" social life.
And when I do go out with my friends, I don't stay out til late because we usually hang out on weekdays. Actually, come to think of it, I almost never go out on the weekends. No one knows this, because I never complained about this, but it sometimes hurt me when I see my friends having the time of their life drinking at bars, going to clubs, having dinner with their partner, etc. I don't understand why am I restricted to have fun. I'm 20 years old.
I never break the law and I'm very aware of my surroundings. My parents taught me well enough to be wary of anyone, regardless if you think you know that person or not. But I feel like they doubt my ability to take care of myself. How do they expect me to learn from anything if they don't let me make mistakes? I can't always learn for my siblings' mistakes - or theirs. After all, that's all part of growing up; we make mistakes and we learn from them.
I don't think I will ever truly experience the teenage rebel life, or know what it's like to "get turnt", how it feels to go out and come back home anytime you want without overthinking that your parents will lock you in the basement if you come back after 12 AM.
Wednesday, 29 Mar 2017
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