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Anita W

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Soul searching

February 2019

@mishmashmich raised some very good points about division and protection of assets after marriage. Yes, we all marry with the precise intent of it being forever... Which is the essence of such a union, but let's not play fools here, half of such good intentions end in divorce.Before I sign any dotted line, be it mortgage or marriage certificate, I will get independent legal advice. And a will.

We've been having pre-engagement chats lately... Just to doubly check we're on the same page, y'know.I mean most of the things we've already talked about before but JUST IN CASE. We're now having formal conversations about them. Being in a serious relationship at 30 vs early 20s is very different. When we discuss things now it's imminent instead of a far off fantasy.

January 2019

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One thing I will say, I was a lot more arrogant at 21 compared to now. I don't know if it was age or lack of life experience but I really thought I was top shit AND beautiful, despite like no effort.

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2009

#10yearchallenge10 years ago I was 21! Wrinkles didn't exist on my face no matter how big I smiled.I thought getting married at 24 was the ultimate dream. Second dream being becoming a Young Mum.I was in my first office job and started gaining weight for the first time ever, due to the sedentary lifestyle. So, I joined the gym.I started drinking for the first time, due to the culture at work.My family broke down and life fell apart because of it.

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escaping poverty

@vanillabeam asked me how my family were able to emigrate to NZ from China, and I had wanted to write the part 2 of growing up poor as well.I grew up poor but I am no longer poor. My budgeting this year is so we can buy a nice house, in a nice suburb, and have the wedding/honeymoon of our dreams. Those are all wants, not needs.Everything I need I have in abundance. That is in stark contrast of how I grew up.

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money matters

So BF and I are in the 'business end' of our relationship now, where shit is getting serious.Marriage is being planned.House buying is in the works.Kids are a distant but real consideration.And what do all those things need? MONEY.Loads and loads of $$$$$$$ because we live in a very expensive city (and we have fairly expensive taste).He's the financial planner in the relationship because he works in finance. And I have a hard time even understanding how money works.

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